Bikan

Bikan
Originally uploaded by Crystal Skull.

Japanese people go nuts for this: the changing colours of Autumn. As far as I know, its the only time all the hotels in Kyoto are booked out with people who have arrived for the national pastime of "leaf viewing". The colours are really beautiful and psychedelic. Some trees go entirely yellow and some go intense scarlet.

The Extremes

When I arrived in Japan, I knew it would be warm, but I had no idea that it would be so warm that I'd have to jump into a cold shower as soon as I got home, and when I was done, spread myself out in front of the airconditioner set to its lowest setting. I was told that I'd appreciate Autumn with its milder temperatures, and I did, all two weeks of it. My apartment that once felt like an oven now feels like a fridge (and my fridge is now used more as a cupboard than anything else, since its hardly any colder than the kitchen). I didn't use hot water in summer, and I don't use it in winter either, because my hot water pipes have frozen shut! No idea why its only the hot water pipes that froze and not the cold ones. I have to shower at my neighbour's and boil the kettle to have a shave in the morning. I always wear a hoodie to bed and avoid moving my head around in case my face touches a freezing part of the pillow. I have watched my classes steadily thin out as the kids succumbed to flu, just before i got it myself and was laid out for two days.

Before I arrived, I thought the hardest part of this mission would be adapting to the foreign culture, but that was easy compared with having to deal with these mad temperatures!

South Africa and Japan are Almost Alike!

Here's a little comparative analysis that proves that these two countries aren't so different after all...
In South Africa homeless people rummage in dustbins for food... In Japan, homeless people rummage in dustbins for batteries for their minidisc players.
In Japan, taxi doors are opened and closed by a silent hydraulic system operated from the driver's seat...In SA, taxi doors are held on with bent coathangers and operated by a toothless, tattooed gangster screaming "MaaauubreiKaaaaaap!"
In Japan, criminal activity is carried out by the Yakuza... In SA, criminal activity is carried out by the government.
In Japan, in the event of an accident, the emergency services respond by immediately sending a police car, an ambulance, a fire engine and a diplomatic task force... In SA, the emergency services respond by saying "Call back if somebody dies".
In Japan, trains often run exactly on time... In SA, trains often run off the rails, into each other, or through station walls.
In Japan, most people smoke... In SA, most people smoke ganja.
In Japan, millions of people live in tiny houses made out of highly insulated lightweight materials... In SA, millions of people live in tiny houses made out of highly flammable lightweight materials
In Japan, you can go to a public toilet and flush, wash your hands and dry them without having to touch anything... In SA you flush with your foot, turn the tap with your elbow and dry your hands on your pants because you don't want to touch anything.
In Japan, government officials are rich because everybody works hard and pays taxes... In SA, government officials are rich because they get kickbacks from arms deals and steal money out of the National Lottery.
In Japan, you can get a new cellphone every few months because the service providers like to keep their customers abreast of the latest technology... In SA, you have to get a new cellphone every few months because the f#%*!ng things keep getting stolen.
In Japan, if you get on the train without a ticket, you can pay at your destination... In SA, if you get on the train without a ticket, you can get arrested (that's if it doesn't derail and crash into a wall first).
In Japan, the bank automatically deducts money from your account because it can pay your water and electricity bill for you... In SA, the bank automatically deducts money from your account because it can.

I love South Africa and I'll be back in the not-too-distant future.

Nani...?

Nani...?
Originally uploaded by Crystal Skull.

I've been going on and on about esoteric mystic ballistic psychosomatics for so long that youre probably wondering when I'm going to post again about this country Im supposed to be in. Well, heres the revised and updated list of things that, as far as I know, can be found...

Only in Japan!

A Pokemon Boeing 747!

TV news with a Funky House soundtrack!

Computerized toilets!

Supermarkets that play Nirvana!

High calorie bars!

Electric flashing police uniforms!

Psytrance on primetime TV!

Leaving your BMW Z3 in the parking lot WITH THE KEYS IN THE IGNITION and the ENGINE RUNNING while you do your shopping!!